All it takes is a little faith

I’ve always been an extremely private person, and it’s very rare that I tell others personal things about myself. I’ve always felt like revealing those ‘fragile’ parts of myself would be a little like stripping myself bare and running naked along public streets, with the scornful eyes of the world shunning me just because I chose to be me.

I guess, in a way, I’ve always been scared – terrified, actually – of the judgements made by others. Sure, I could laugh off snarky comments and rude remarks because I knew that the people who uttered those mean words didn’t know the real me anyway – but I was afraid, so afraid of showing anything beneath the surface, because what if they did know the real me and still made those snide comments? What if the real me simply isn’t good enough for this world?

Today, after attending a Christmas party at an Anglican Church, I realised that I’ve been staring at the answers to my questions and doubts this whole time.

It’s Christmas Eve – the night before Jesus was born; the night where all Mary, Joseph and the shepherds needed was a little faith and a little hope – a little reminder from God and the angels: do not be afraid.

I am not a religious person, but I do believe in having a little faith and a little hope in yourself. Never fear the thought of being your whole selves – fragile parts included. If the world shuns you just because you chose to be yourself, then it’s the world’s loss because it is the one who missed the chance of getting to know a truly remarkable and utterly breathtaking person that is you.

Listen to what the angels told the shepherds: do not be afraid. Do not be afraid that the real you isn’t good enough (you most definitely are good enough!). Do not be afraid of stripping yourself bare (metaphorically – won’t want you catching a cold 😛 ), because the real you is beautiful in every crack and fissure.

That is what I’ve learnt – all it takes is a little faith. Not just in yourself, but in others as well – faith that others will accept, love and embrace the real you (they would be stupid not to!).

So, have a little faith. You will be amazed.

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Here you stand, battered but not defeated

The things some people say to you – most of the time, they don’t mean it at all; sometimes, they actually mean well… and that should make their words harmless, right?

Yet you wonder, if their words are so harmless, then why do they still hurt as much as they do? And why are you just standing there, taking every hit as it comes? Why are you letting every word slam you right across your chest, right across your heart?

Why aren’t you running? Why aren’t you dodging?

Deep down, you know why.

Deep down, you know that if you hold your ground – if you can just show those words that they can’t break your strength even though they’re smashing your heart to splinters – then it proves that you’re not weak. It proves that you’re not broken – not now, not ever. It proves that you’re not afraid to fall down. It proves that even if you do fall down, even if you are battered and bruised, you aren’t defeated, because you will always have the strength to stand right back up again.

It’s not valour that stops you from running away – it’s pride. It’s that piece of dignity you hold onto ever so tightly. It’s fear of losing that dignity.

And how ironic, you think, that you’re holding your ground out of fear. Maybe fear and courage are not so different after all.